If you’re here reading, hi.
Thanks for not forgetting me.
I hope that you checking my blog is because you’ve been wondering where I’ve gone missing.
I really want to let you know this:
My heart that day when you stopped talking to me.
That same day, something in me felt like it died.
The next day, I gave up on love, after years of believing in it.
Then I gave up on you, after all these years I thought you’ll be there.
Yesterday, I had a dream. The dream came like a flashback and then I remembered all those good times and forgot all this hate I’ve been accumulating.
It went like this: It was you and me, going down to the canteen and bought some food while I got myself some extra chips. Then after, I fell on this ditch and like, passed out for a few seconds before going noisy on how karma-ish it was. You laughed and we went on after crying for a moment for the chips I spilt.
Then we had our lunch before the next class and I saw how amusing it was seeing you chew with difficulty. We talked and ate, and then when we were finished, we talked some more. I remember you got this smile I really like. But I always remembered your hair. We talked about your hair a lot, vividly I remember how long it was.
When the dream ended, all the anger on you was still there, but this time a bit relaxed.
I thought about the difference of my life with you in it, and my life without you in it. But I get it. When this happened, it gave an opportunity for me to search myself. You know, basic ‘find whole reason to being’ stuff, what you really mean to me, and why I could never put you off my mind. I think I’m close to the answer.
I wish I could tell you about Japan. It was your dream too.
And you know, the moment I was in Japan and breathed in the spring air it was a journey start to healing. Yet, it was the flowers that helped me.
My heart healed the moment I saw the blossoms.
Wished you were there with me.
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